White Clay stories was inspired by a mystical experience I had in the Kootney Mountains of British Columbia during a yoga training in the spring of 2011. The experience provoked me to start a blog and to include writing in my business.
While in the forest depths of Mountain Waters Retreat Center, lieing in a deep Savasana (corpse pose), I experienced an unusual sensation arise from the center of my heart. It began as a tangible, flowing sensation, a movement of matter, of which emerged the mental image of swirling white clay. As this soothing clay continued to flow, molding and shaping from the center of my heart, it slowly formed itself into the shape of an enormous colliseum. Similiar to the structures I’ve seen of ancient Greece. Within the structure appeared my closest loved ones, my children and my partner.
When I returned from Savasana I felt transformed somehow as though a new place of my own being had emerged. This inner transformation so many of us can more easily relate to through obvious events such as an adventure, illness, birth of a child or a death in the family. I tried to describe this event first to myself, and then to others and it was surprisingly very difficult to do. I struggled with words as though I were translating a foreign language into English and I knew very little of either. Our language could not, or would not, quite fit or adequately describe my experience. Even now, language remains a limitation.
My experience wasn’t an image without body, floating somewhere in the swirls of my mind, like a vision, nor was it a body only experience, sensation or symptom. It was both. The sensations of moving flesh, swirling this tangible substance, like moist clay earth were part of me, part of my heart. My body. The image, in my minds eye, white pillars, shaped into an enormous colliseum, my loved ones there inside. Was mind or imagination. The feeling this blend of mind and matter gave me I can only describe as the greatest nourishment I have experienced; Love.
As a writer often flooded with the intangible of idea’s, this experience became my own embodied creative third. A merging place of Mind and Matter; the place where the limited story of separation we all live in our ego’s, disolved some, and a greater wholeness emerged. This integration took me another step closer to wholeness, the authenticity of soul and to love.
As I ponder the juxtaposed. Words and Clay. Mind and Matter. Idea and Form. I see the paradox. Words shape story. Idea shapes words. Inspiration shapes idea. Soul sparks inspiration. Mystery sparks Soul. Matter is clay. Clay is form. Form takes many shapes. Inspiration changes story. Story changes matter. Pillars swirl. Within this mysterious blend is everything.